Diary of a Closet Freak

You might be wondering what good manners has to do with pussy. Believe it or not, gentlemen, displaying chivalry towards women on a consistent basis is GARUN-TEED to get you increased pussy. For many of you out there pussy is like the holy grail, so it is really worth the extra effort. I got this idea from another blogger’s post called Deadened Chivalry. It made me realize how most of us women in general appreciate a little old-fashioned gallantry, but I fear it is a lost art, so that is why I decided to address this important topic with a lesson here at Copulation College.

Simple Examples of Chivalry-
-Pay for my drinks, as well as my girlfriend if she is with me and single (that act of chivalry alone might get you a threesome if you get us drunk enough!). Pick me up for our dates instead of telling me to meet you (guys in NYC are notorious for that shit). Arrive early for our dates and dress nicely instead of looking like you came from basketball practice.
-Pay for our dates. If you have no money, take me to inexpensive/trendy places that still have atmosphere or do something free. Remember I got my own shit and I am not a golddigger. I will give it back to you either through a nice gift or I’ll cook for you or I’ll bring you lunch one day. But if it’s a date you should pay- even if I am the one who suggested we do something. At the table, once we’ve looked at the menu, ask me what I am having and order for me when the waiter comes. Pray before the meal. If we are chilling at your house, ask me if I want to watch something else on the tv besides ESPN or FOXSPORTS or ESPN Classic…
-Open doors for me to buildings or to the car. Walk me to my car whether its a block away or if it’s in your driveway. Turn my car around in the driveway or back it out for me (I told ya’ll I can’t drive). Go get my bag out of the car if I am spending the night. Put your hand in the small of my back if we are going through a crowd or the sidewalk is broken up. Call me the day after the date, especially if you get the poonani.

Should U B Chivalrous to all women?
I say yes. Others may say no. I say be gallant towards the chic that is for kicks as well as the one who is for keeps. If you are married don’t get lazy and stop doing the little things. It takes practice to perfect the skills so you should do it as often as possible, plus if you do it all the time, things will become second nature and you won’t have to keep your Copulation College Checklist with you. Women are very observant and when we see men that treat other sistah’s respectfully, that makes him more desirable, or if you are already my man, it makes me feel proud of you. I also think being a gentleman makes men feel like more of a man too, because they are assuming their proper role.

What Chivalry Does to Women
Courtesy and respect makes us feel special, safe, appreciated. These emotions (for closetfreak anyway) translate to attraction, arousal, wet pussy. It makes me feel like a woman and I in turn want to put all my womanliness on you in the bedroom- at which time you can dispense with the manners and treat me like a whore. lol. (I mean it) Except don’t cum in my hair if I tell you not too…oops let me stay on track here.

Anyway, those are just some general tips, and I hope people share some thoughts as well. After completing today’s lesson, go out and show some good manners, then report back. That is your homework, unless you are too busy enjoying the new pussy that you earned through your chivalry. In that case you get an extension on the assignment.

Class Dismissed